“Right now, I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I‘ve forgotten this before.”- Steven Wright
While mostly, almost all of us are living a hurried life where we hardly find time to sit and ponder about the nuances of life-same is not the situation with our storage system- mind-it is not at all in haste. For it meticulously stores everything you do in your lifetime. Each day of our life, we make deposits in our memory bank. Wherever you go, whatever you do- you leave a mark in your memory. However, we hardly remember everything.
Some memories are forever, whilst several of them are unremembered due to their triviality. Some are shoved away due to the unpleasant taste it brings. At the same time, others lose their sheen soon in the absence of a physical peg suchlike picture albums and handwritten letters. However, some require thrust of similar circumstances to evoke the memories which were sleeping quietly somewhere. For instance, while passing by the chaiwallah point, you start smiling on your own while remembering the incidents that happened there-reviving the old memories one more time.
Memories of such moments arouse similar sensations that you might have felt when a particular incident happened in reality. Few such incidents bring back a rush of emotions. Have you ever pondered about what you remember? And why do you remember a few incidents vividly while others become hazy as time passes, leading to gradual slip from our memory?
“He was still too young to know that the heart’s memory eliminates the bad and magnifies the good, and that thanks to this artifice we manage to endure the burden of the past.”Excerpt from Love in the Time of Cholera by Gabriel García Márquez
Even if we are not together- you will always stay in my memories – sounds familiar? Memories are not only a mixed bag of previous experiences, it is an amalgamation of anything at all that adorns that particular experience- the situation where it took place, aroma, gestures, emotional expressions, feelings, bodily sensations etc. Memories are a medium to muse about those whom we might have left midway in a journey called life.
Some spent their life without being present physically with each other. Affinity may not be visible to the eyes- it is visible to the heart. Mental proximity helps such souls to sail through perplexing times in their lives. Such strong is the strength of mental connect that goes beyond the need to be physically present! They seek warmth from the memories that give refuge time and again to reassure that life is still beautiful. Such memories accord the courage to live life with a smile accepting the reality to live in the present moment.
Virginia Woolf says, “I can only note that the past is beautiful because one never realizes an emotion at the time. It expands later, and thus we don’t have complete emotions about the present, only about the past.”
Memories rescue us. Yes, it also troubles us time and again. Such memories confiscate our peace of mind-devour our sleep. However, it also emancipates us from obscured troubles. Haruki Murakami says, “Memories warm you up from the inside. But they also tear you apart.”
Without our awareness, each day of our lives, we are making deposits in our memory bank. Let those deposits beams your face with their happy vibes. For if memories are a cluster of unfulfilled desires, infidelity, abuse, darkness-very likely, it comes back even with greater force.
As Sigmund Freud says, “unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and they’ll come forth later in uglier ways.”
Memories might engulf you with sadness till you decide to take it as a lesson and move on. Let it fly off from the window-it was caged/buried for ages forging you behave differently. Recognize who you are! Free yourself from the grip of such memories that are not capable of bringing peace and a smile to your life.
For I say heavier the box of unwanted things that need to be thrown-lighter you may feel.
It is never too late to loosen the grip, as sometimes letting go is the only way to have peace with our memories and with ourselves -to lead a happier life where sometimes a quick flash brings a smile to your face.
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